Monday, September 04, 2006

Earth in the Balance

I drop my bacon sandwich this morning, on the news that the obese now outnumber the starving worldwide by a good 200 million.

Is it just me, or does the solution not pretty much suggest itself?


Eat - eat, my pretty! And win a free ticket to Darfur. Heh heh heh…

12 comments:

Rob said...

Deary me, that is confusing. Your solution does have a certain elegance however.

Ivan the Terrible said...

Certainly takes care of Michael Moore. Now if only we can tempt Paris Hilton into a fat-suit we're sorted...

Aunty Marianne said...

Ahem. Meet the EU's current political master for Development and Humanitarian Aid. And a prospective aid recipient.

Now THAT's direct aid for you.

Seamus said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Seamus said...

Obesity thins into insignificance compared with the real danger of our time - the Dihydrogen Monoxide menace.

I urge you all to write to your political leaders, wannabe palitical leaders, do-gooding celebrities and crusading columnists to see who among them takes up the challenge of ridding humanity of this toxic substance.

Read this for details: http://www.dhmo.org/

Ivan the Terrible said...

Talk about a hungry gaze, Aunty. Tho' it's a coin-toss as to who will lunge at whom.

And Seamus, thanks for that timely reminder of the dangers of so noxious a chemical. Unfortunately, if the EU got wind of that site they probably would genuinely outlaw it, so I'll thank you to keep it under your hat...

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Dearie me, Auntie M. If someone in Brussels were to heat a large wok and render that man down to a normal size Africa could eat for a week.

Desargues said...

I find Ivan's suggestion rather dangerous. The perils of so many starving children suddenly switching to cholesterol-heavy diets are manifold. We risk trading malnutrition for a sharp spike in heart attacks. A protein-rich regiment may be what the world's hungry really need. Perhaps we can start with some of those obnoxious, muscular athletes...

Starving children of Africa, I offer you Barry Bonds.

Ivan the Terrible said...

Or just cut out the middle-man and chow down on a big bucket of steroids, eh Des?

Desargues said...

Erm... point taken, Ivan. But maybe we can offer them free-range athletes? They will all be amateur athletes, it goes without saying. But I could do without some of the lacrosse guys and girls in my classes.

Ivan the Terrible said...

Best thing to do with a free-range lacrosse player is to stick 'em in a battery-farm cage. That'll soon wipe the smiles off their faces...

Me! said...

I can see your idea going down well in China where they'll eat just about any type of 'meat'. But I wonder if the Sudanese are pickier about what they put in their mouth. God knows they could have come up with the same idea but so far haven't.

Why don't we just send Jamie Oliver over there and get him to hire 15 emaciated refugees and make them solve their own country's woes?