Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Glass half full

Joy tempered by a vague cloud of suspicion, as three Mexican shark fishermen are found alive after nine months adrift at sea, surviving on raw fish and rain water.

Gaunt yet grateful, the threesome ascribe their continued existence to the Bible that they had on board with them. Now, that wouldn’t have been the first thing on my list when equipping a fishing expedition, but it’s probably not a bad choice, given a limited budget. We can’t all have GPS and decent radios, after all – otherwise how would we know if we were rich jerks or not?

Naturally, being Mexicans, they are not entirely trusted even by their rescuers. Some suggest that they were running drugs, while others ask whether their two dead colleagues did in fact die of thirst. Subliminal suggestions of cannibalism circle the unhappy trio like sharks around their rudderless boat.

Well, if they did chow down on their companions to survive, it wouldn’t be the first time. That’s the law of the sea – quite literally, as men have on several occasions been cleared of murder when, in the desperate circumstances of a shipwreck, they killed others to take their life jackets.

But maybe karma has already taken steps to restore the balance. After nine months of ripping the throats out of seagulls with their teeth, they end up on the Marshall Islands. The least fate could do was pitch them up on US shores. Santa Barbara, say, or even Seattle.

But if it’s any consolation to the families of the dead, we do know that the others didn’t eat them alive. After all, they weren’t driven ashore in LA, either…


Salvador Ordonez, Jesus Vidana and Lucio Rendon celebrate their arrival on land with one of their rescuers, yesterday, before treating the latter to “a slap-up meal”. Police are now anxious to trace the gentleman in question…

19 comments:

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Mexicans eh? Taste a bit like chicken, don't they?

Just spotted the link. Thank-you! When did that go up?

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Or is that Turks?

Ivan the Terrible said...

Hi Sam - you're very welcome re the link. It's been there quite a while I think - see what you miss if you're not paying attention? :)

Definitely Turks. As you'd expect, I got my fill of Hungary for Turkey jokes living in Budapest so long. Mexicans, on the other hand, are famous for their taco flavoured kisses...

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Paying attention is for wimps Uncle Vanya. At least that is my philosophy when overserved which I am and it being only 4 fifty something in the pm. ! The children are being ably (I might say amply but that would be horrid of me) babysat by a lovely lady and I am worry-free for the afternoon and drunk! It's a special occasion of sorts. The hubby came back from his trip last night and we hd a rather nice lunch with alcohol and everything today. i'd forgoten grown-ups didi that! It is so very jolly and lovely. the problem husband had some calls to make and I, being responsibility free 'til tea-time, thought i'D go make an arse of myself around my blogpals. Aren't you glad you linked me!

I do adore you so though Ivan, even if our politics are objectionable to one another's. I suspect you of being much much smarter than me though, although in my way I'm plenty smart, and consider it both a treat and a priviledge to be around you and Des and Randall and everyone. I've always thought it good practice to hang around with people smarter and more knowledgable than me.

You never disappoint Vanya. And now I think I'll be off. D'you think Randall's in?

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ivan the Terrible said...

Wow - pissed as a newt at 5pm! I too had forgotten those halcyon days, and I am green with envy. Happy to hear you're carving a moment for yourself there! As for treats and privileges, the feeling is mutual. You're something of a role model, after all. It's a nice change to see someone get smashed without saying anything silly about the Jews :)

Well, I can't let you have all the fun - I'm off to crack open some a merlot...

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
PI said...

Ivan: just to settle a point in my comment box - which - as a man - would you rather discuss:-'tragic love' or football (or the American equivalent)?
Any other man fell free.

PI said...

Just read Sam's comment. She might adore you but she loves me!

Rob. said...

Spammed by someone who doesn't like your blog! That's a new one innit?

Ivan the Terrible said...

"tragic love or American football", Pi? Tragic Love, for sure.

Just don't ask me about tragic love vs rugby...

Stew said...

Hi, I was looking at your blog and it's really great. Unfortunately I don't have anything to sell you. I have no bright ideas on how to make money either.
Last month I spent most of my time on the internet downloading porn. I could give you some URLs for free porn if you like, but I'm not all that bothered.
Nothing to see here, move along

Desargues said...

...pissed as a newt at 5pm... -- sounds like Sam's in grad school. As the witzig Oirishman Wilde once put it, work is the curse of the drinking classes.

About them Mexican fellers -- next time they go out to sea they should also take a bottle of Nature's Youth. Then they'll have both Marion Gordon "Pat" Robertson and G Gordon Liddy to testify that you can live on vitamins and reading the Bible for nine months. That's how they got to pester an unsuspecting humanity for seventy years now.

Rob said...

I have some great ideas for making money, but I'm not telling you lot.

Ivan the Terrible said...

You'll never get rich with that attitude, Rob.

I, on the other hand, not only have a thick wad of sure-fire get-rich-quick schemes, but am willing to share them with anyone. Anyone who sends me $100, that is. I do have some out-of-pocket expenses to cover, you know...

Desargues said...

You're not in business with people like these, Ivan, are you:


Hello Dear,
My name is Alice Lacson,The wife of Mr.Panfilo Lacson a senator during
president joseph Estrada regime in Philippine.who is receently killed
in philippine.During my husband's regime as a senator,I realized some
reasonableamount of money from various deals that I successfully executed
and mybuisness in the united state of which the Government has block most of
my account in the bank of america,trying to leave me with nothing.well
before my late husband was killed,I secretly put in a box the sum of
$30,000,000 million USD (Thirty million United states dollars) and deposit
it in a security company abroad.

I am contacting you because I want you to help me in securing the money for
the future of my children since the government now monitor all my movement.
I hope to trust you as who will not sit on this money when you claim
it.i will give you 15% of the total money for your assistance.if you
are willing to help me.
Best regards
Mrs Alice Lacson. N:b Pls reach me through this email id:
mrsalicela@yahoo.com.ph

Ivan the Terrible said...

WooHoo - jackpot! You're a lucky man, Des. Good to see your virtue rewarded at last... :)

Desargues said...

Yeah. Never gave too much credence to that nonsense about virtue being its own reward. As they say in the movies, show me the money, baby.