Monday, November 06, 2006

Maiden Aunt

Food for thought as the BBC compares Western promiscuity with those fine upstanding moralists of sub-Saharan Africa.

“Why oh why are Westerners such sluts compared to Ethiopians?” Aunty Beeb asks us, shaking her head sadly. Probably for the same reason that they punch out four times as many kids, despite having fewer partners – they have no condoms.

I would also add that they live in a shithole with nothing else to do, but seeing as there is no baby-boom in Birmingham I must reluctantly lay that argument aside.

Nevertheless, it must be significant that every single man in Ethiopia between the ages of 35 and 39 is getting laid. I mean to say, every single one. You’d think their tourist board would’ve made some hay out of that little data point by now. But no, they’re sticking with “Ethiopia – bring food!” for the twenty third year running. Those Saatchis have really lost their edge, if you ask me.

Once again the BBC manages to simultaneously patronise the Third World while slagging off its own nation and culture. Too many of those spineless lefties seem to be auditioning for jobs under the first sharia government. No-one beats a socialist when it comes to getting their surrender in early – as Francois “Mr Vichy” Mitterand would be the first to tell you...


Compare and contrast: liberal democracy and emancipated females vs third world goat-herding – which is superior? Think you know? Aunty knows better!

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes, but if I am reading those graphs correctly, our 45+ lot are at it like rabbits, whereas the Ethiopians are probably all dead. From all the fucking in their thirties presumably.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Ethiopian women are either very loyal or damned good liars.

Ivan the Terrible said...

Or very very scared, GB - let's not forget that option...

Anonymous said...

Oh, it's a Lancet study!

Anyway, according to Unicef, the average life expectancy of an Ethiopian is 48. Therefore, if the sexual partners graph for 45-49 year old Ethiopians were mapped to the equivalent British demographic, that is, 80-85 year olds, then I’m sure the trends would be similar.

Fat Sparrow said...

You know, I just had one of my many brilliant thoughts.... What if the Ethiopians started eating their sex partners, like Black Widow spiders do? They could keep up the sex rate, and cut down on starvation. It's a win-win all around.

Ivan the Terrible said...

Why eat the wife when there are sweet juicy Somalians at hand, Ms Sparrow? We could do with thinning out those raghead psychos a little...

Pat said...

I used to really like Haille Selassie but not enough to learn how to spell his name.

Anonymous said...

Yes, they're getting laid. But do they have "Dancing With The Stars?"

Let's get our priorities straight, shall we?

Cheers.

The Aunt said...

Condoms. I am trying, you know. I bought 280 million last year.

Which was only enough for the population of Nigeria to have sex 5.6 times each all year, assuming there are two of 'em at each occasion.

And assuming the women can get the men to use them...

I'm doing my best but it would be nice if someone else bought some too. USAID, for example.