The story of evolution just got a little more complicated, as science demonstrates that early men and chimps continued to interbreed for at least a million years after the initial split of the two species. Boffins theorise that these miscegenous contacts took place mostly on Saturday nights, around closing time, in the alleys next to paleolithic kebab shops.
If nothing else, this finding speaks volumes for the lengths to which the human male will go to achieve temporary satisfaction, no matter how unnatural or distasteful the means. For example, I knew a young man at university from whom no jar of honey or peanut butter was safe. Not even switching to crunchy peanut butter could slow him down – in fact I suspect that he preferred the texture. Eventually I had to start keeping mine locked in my room, the loose-lidded little minx.
Anyway, at least now we know where scousers come from…
Some scousers, yesterday, in their picturesque native costumes. You all saw that one coming, right?