By my reckoning, the people of Britain have exactly five hours left to express their deep and abiding love of Tony Blair and his noble New Labour Knights. Paragons all. Don't you wish you could spend all day voting for them? Sadly, only Sinn Fein supporters and ethnic "community leaders" from the Midlands with suitcases full of fraudulent postal votes are allowed to vote more than once, and what with one thing and another neither group are natural Labour voters right now.
We mere mortals will have to take up the slack. If you haven't voted yet, look into the eyes of the Blairs, here - so loveable and trustworthy - and do the right thing. Remember all the good times. Wonder idly how much her hair cost this time. Laugh a little over the antics of that loveable rascal Two Shags, and the hospital that doesn't have any patients 'cos the PFI contract took up all the budget and they can't afford any staff.
Concentrate on the nine years of achievements instead of the nine days of headlines. Yes, the achievements. You know the ones he means. Yes, those ones.
Now off you go and vote.
Tony, yesterday. Tony is our friend...