Friday, August 04, 2006

Ivan’s Site of the Week

This week’s winner is Dictator of the Month, which some eagle-eyed and anally retentive readers might recall making a brief guest appearance in a previous post on our good friend Alexandr Lukashenko.

I’ve been a regular visitor since then, and I must say I have never been disappointed in its breadth and depth of tyrant-related coverage. Closing our eyes to its vaguely sinister German language sister-site, we’ll assume it’s all good tongue-in-cheek fun and leave it at that. Otherwise my ethical position would be terrible, and I’d hate to live in a world where that could be true…

Anyway, the site has added poignancy for me ever since I invented my marvellous new Alternatron, which allows me to explore alternative histories by changing key events in history. It’s amazing how many top-notch dictators there were who never got the chance to explore their full potential.

Brian Wilson, for example, was a real bastard as acting military governor of post-nuclear California.


Brian Wilson yesterday – the embodiment of ultimate evil. Oooo – makes my skin crawl just looking at him.

17 comments:

johnnyboy said...

As a somewhat pointless footnote on Brian Wilson: in the documentary "Theremin", one can catch a perplexing but ultimately entertaining interview of the might-have-been dictator, in a decidedly under-medicated state.

Aunty Marianne said...

I cannot believe you have not yet featured Jacques Santer.

Desargues said...

What? They have articles on lame-ass wusses like Janos Kadar and Ter-Petrosyan, but there's not entry on Ceausescu? These guys' claims to objectivity have now been thoroughly undermined. But I had my doubts even before I started inspecting their archives. From a DoM article on East Germany:

Now Germany, like Holland, is at a crossroads, Either the „pure German Culture will be fostered or abandoned; but no matter what the culture will change as more foreign influences come into Germany.

I suspect this is a piece written from exile by DoM featuree Alfredo Stroessner.

I will, however, check back regularly. Soon enough, they'll have a piece on Tony Blair, too.

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

If the Beach Boys were tannoyed to the masses daily it would beat any populace into submission.

Whilst knowing in my head how seminal and important was their music, I have never been able to listen to more than 3 or 4 Beach Boy songs at one sitting. The falsetto seems to jangle at precisely the same nerve as some nerve of mine that aspires to aural epilepsy.

Ivan the Terrible said...

Timely medication has ruined a lot of promising careers, JB. Let's just be happy for Brian that he managed to escape his handlers for a few brief moments of creative self-expression.

That I haven't featured Jacques, Aunty? Or that DotM hasn't? Eurocrats are too banal to be truly evil. Dante already has their spot picked out for them - the Vestibule of Hell, where those who took no stand for or against anything are condemned to chase eternally after a blank banner. Perhaps we need a site for that - "Seven People You Might Meet In Hell" © IvanCrap Productions 2006...

It's like I said, Des, you've got to be careful about sites in German. Germans are so often "misunderstood".

Ivan the Terrible said...

Hi Sam - and count your blessings. If the Beach Boys were bad, imagine the damage the Carpenters could have done...

Seamus said...

Brian Wilson? Just imagine the evil that the Mike Love junta would do. Now there's nominative anti-determinism for you. A friend of mine is working as a medic in Darwin, NT, and rostered opposite him on call of nights is Dr Death. I'm sure the Darwinists don't mind.

On another note, as the AP's WIlliam J Kole put it Famed Soprano Elisabeth Schwarzkopf has died

Amusingly, William J Kole announces that Elisabeth was the aunt of none other than Stormin' Norman himself.

Which seemed unlikely. Norman's dad, also H. Norman, was born in 1895 in New Jersey, to "Julius George Schwarzkopf and Agnes Sarah Schmidt" while Elisabeth was born in 1915 to " Friedrich Schwarzkopf and his wife, Elisabeth Fröhling."

And indeed, last Easter I noticed the aunt-of-Stormin' claim on Wikipedia. And did nothing. Even when I noticed the AP obit had the dodgy factoid also.

Tonight I suddenly thought I could expose the dread Main Stream Media by pointing out Mr Kole's obvious use of wikipedia for his obit. But the wikiepdiaists have already copped on - as can be see by looking at the wikipedia Elisabeth Schwarzkopf article.

Thus I am drunkenly commenting in my favourite blogs (thus far, only yours, although I also commented in a blogger account I had never read before but had via google was also passing on the false relationship between them)

Do you remember the time the Sunday Times magzine's "Relative Values" bit featured Bamber and Paul Gascoigne as brothers? (Or was it cousins)

Feel free to use this as the basis for further posts. You are a new father after all. Well, not a new father really, as you already were a father, but you know what I mean. For all the entertainment you have given me free gratis and for nothing, I insist you rip this of-I mean borrow the idea. You can even delete this post if you want to cover your tracks.

Hic.

Seamus said...

To be honest I'm not drunk, just tired. I feel like I should be drunk though. I coulda been someone in the blogosphere. I coulda been a contender.

Desargues said...

Lizzie Blackhead had no relation whatsoever to the American Lawrence of Arabia--not any more than these makers of pomade do. She did, however, do a great service to all of the United States by educating world-class barytone Thomas Hampson. Another inspired move was to marry Walter Legge, one of the finest producers of opera recordings, and an early enthusiast for stereo sound. Their talents come together in pieces like this one.

Desargues said...

In fact, I now see that Seamus has, in one of his blog posts, provided a German-English version of one of Strauss' Four Last Songs. Go read it, and then buy the disc--no, not that one. This one.

Phew. That was a lot of hrefs.

apprentice said...

I love the Google ads on that site, they're all for executive training. No bullying in the workplace then...........

Ivan the Terrible said...

Chin up, Seamus - you are a contender, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

The idea of Paul and Bamber sitting around the same turkey at Christmas is quite entertaining. Imagine the fight over the remote control after dinner.

I'm just surprised there's not more nonsense about the Brothers Blair (Tony and Sir Ian). Hard to believe they're not related, really. They certainly deserve each other...

Ivan the Terrible said...

Des - that's enough Schwartzkopfs, thanks. We knew there were plenty of them, but it's still a bit creepy to realize how many of them walk among us...

And Apprentice, it is an interesting juxtaposition - workplace training alongside dictatorship. I guess that kind of boss just makes you want to polish the resume and move on.

Seamus said...

Thanks Ivan! And Des ... well, its good to see someone's looking at my blog. Or rather "blog" Actually maintaining it is something I keep resolving to do and yet never seem to get around to.

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